Bloody Mary

The human body’s natural reaction to blood is to recoil; some people even experience dizziness and pass out. The dramatic reaction is known as vasovagal syncope, but that’s not being discussed today, nor is the fear of blood or hemophobia. But I advise you to turn away if you fall into such categories. Look away if you’re the sort to cower behind your hand during scary movies, and you should most definitely turn away if you can’t stomach HBO productions–for obvious gory reasons.

The mere thought or idea of this topic caused quite the ado between me, Kehinde (the other only male colleague), my editor, who is female, and Sophia, who is also female. For some reason, they (the ladies) were utterly disgusted by the idea of period sex. As for the guys, not so much.

Oh, stop, don’t cringe and contour your face in disgust. It’s not as bad as it sounds, and truth be told, it doesn’t sound ‘that’ bad. It’s understandable that period flows, on its worst days, can look like a murder scene, but nobody knows quite as much as you do. And for a lady to voluntarily consent to menstrual sex, despite her regularly scheduled programming, as a guy, you shouldn’t worry. But then again, it is very subjective. Most ladies I’ve had the privilege of asking if it was something they’d partake in or have partaken in were appalled by it. Whereas the men I asked have partaken in it at least once. A quantitative study carried out by PubMed stated that among the 92 women who said they were sexually active, 37 women said they would never have intercourse during menstruation, eight women said they tried it once but never would again, and seven women said they rarely would and only under certain conditions. The largest group, 40 women, said they do have menstrual sex. In a further study of 12 men, three were virgins, and among the nine sexually experienced men, seven said they did have sex with a menstruating partner.

Despite how unclean the holy books have deemed sexual intercourse during menstruation (see Leviticus 15:24 in the Bible and Surah al-Baqarah 2:222 in the Qur’an), a lot of what’s happening today was also abolished and frowned upon sexually, still happens a thousand years later today. Healthline claims sexual relations with a woman during her time of the month offer relief to menstrual cramps, shorter cramps, increased libido and natural lubrication—that’s a no-brainer. In addition, it further states that the mess created by having sex while on your period is its major drawback. Blood may get on you, your partner, and the sheets if she has a heavy flow. In addition to making the bed messy, bleeding might make you feel embarrassed. The fun of sex can be diminished, sometimes completely, by worry over making a mess. I mean, nothing kills the mood faster than blood splattering everywhere—just teasing.

While Healthline gives you room to consider your response when your sneaky link says “I’m on my period,” a case study published in the International Journal of Fertility and Sterility leaves rooms for you to opt out of the act. Asides from sexually transmitted diseases, an increase in the flow of menstrual blood, and undesirable pregnancy (which are normal things that occur during sex), there’s a risk of endometriosis; a disorder in which tissue that normally lines the uterus grows outside the uterus. With endometriosis, the tissue can be found on the ovaries, fallopian tubes or intestines. But then again, according to google, this condition is rated as ‘common’ in Nigeria with more than a hundred thousand cases per year and is very treatable. Need I say more?

So far, science, medicine and research have okayed menstrual sex. All that’s left is religion, what society knows as taboo, and whether or not you choose to indulge in it. As far as everyone is considered, sex involves various types of fluids and excretions, including arousal fluid (being “wet”), ejaculate (“cum”), sweat, occasionally urine, and even faecal matter (if you’re open to butt stuff). Menstrual blood might seem like a reason to avoid sexual intercourse if it goes against what you stand for. But for the sexually neutral, if you find yourself in such a position, and there’s mutual consent, you’re free to do what floats your boat.

When we (Mary and I) found ourselves in a similar situation, we had both just returned from a house party. We had met each other before through mutual friends and that was it but with the way she grinded into me on the dance floor, it began to feel very familiar. I knew exactly where this was going. The smell of her leave-in hair conditioner and Gucci Bloom perfume intoxicated my pelvis followed by the beat of her waist. And her waist beads followed suit, dancing like those on a shekere. Her thick ass brushed my tumescence with every wiggle and jiggle. The cloak of the night sky is when most unspeakable acts are spoken and that night I was paying attention to what Mary’s body was telling me. Her palm teasingly rubbed the bulge in my pants, before her ass, once again, rejoined the party. Our bodies couldn’t take anymore, they craved for each other like the ear craved sound and like the mouth longed for taste. The words “let’s get out of here,” were snatched from my lips before they had the time to roll out. I liked where her head was at, and another part of me liked where a head would be later that night even more. As we hurried to the hotel across the street, where we both had made plans to spend the night before crossing paths, I faintly heard— who I later found out was her boyfriend—call out to her as we frantically dashed out of the party.

Mary couldn’t wait till we got into the room. As I struggled to get the keycard out of my pocket, her tongue was already halfway down my throat. With her heels in her hand and the other grabbing the key from me, she beeped the door open, and we both fell into the room. We were both resting on the door and were too carried away to take a step back before opening it. But we laughed it off as she fought with my belt buckle, and I did the same to her brassiere. She muttered something under her breath which was hard to believe. I played it off at first; perhaps it was a slip of her tongue or my ears playing tricks on me. But then, she said it again, leaving my mouth agape. “I’m on my period.” I was about to retort with “you must be joking, right?” when she added, “But if you don’t mind the blood, we could still do it.” Mind what blood? Please, call me Usher because I Don’t Mind. I accidentally ripped off the latch on my brief hold while getting out a condom before responding, “I don’t mind as long as you are okay with it,” spotting a coy smile.

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