The presence of a father in a child’s life is priceless.

All the time a father spends with his kids from infancy to adulthood helps reinforce and is instrumental to the development and growth of those children. Picking them up from school, asking them how their day went, being there for the special moments, and going out for groceries– and coming back– all have positive effects on a child. But in the playgrounds of sexual explorations, the term ‘daddy’ in most cases has very little to do with actual fathers. Rather, it serves as a term of endearment between partners or lovers. Pinpointing its origin dates it as far back as the late 1600s when prostitutes used the term to refer to their pimps or relatively older customers.

For some strange reason, men love being called daddy and females love calling men ‘daddy’. Trust me, I know; it really does things to us. Wading through the morass of what the term daddy means, its infiltration into our bedrooms and mainstream media is another kettle of fish. And I intend to help clear up any complications you have on the subject. First of all, unlike the definition of father, daddy has some wriggle room. Another meaning for daddy is; the best or most successful person and this allows us to get a better understanding of context. In contexts of dominance and control, the term ‘daddy’ often implies a dominant power role orientation. As mainstream sexual power dynamics would have it, the man is boss, in charge, a protector, or doing a good job. Which is usually the meaning women are going for in the bedroom.

Interestingly, PornHub’s analytic team discovered that women tend to search for ‘dad’ and ‘daddy’ 96 per cent more than men do. Is that to suggest that most daddy adorers harbour some sort of ‘daddy issues’ and the daddy ‘kink’ serves as a tool to work through any unresolved feelings within a safe, sexual environment? Alternatively, could the sexual interest have nothing to do with underlying issues, and the fetish be nothing more than an exploration of the same kind of sexual attraction? Ascertaining why most people partake in unconventional sexual activities that leave acres of room for interpretation is usually a case of taking painkillers for another person’s headache. Agreed, it could either be A or B but should you be overthinking the sexual practices of two or more happy and consenting adults? When compared to other sexual predilections, calling your partner or partners ‘daddy’ is the missionary position or kinks because there’s nothing to it and when a girl called me ‘daddy’ the last thing on her mind was her father.

Somewhere in my multifaceted career, I had a short stint working as an educator and there was a colleague of mine, at the time, that I had a thing with. So on one faithful day, all the teachers were asked to resume a day before the school’s end of the year celebration. I liked the idea of bringing Christmas cheer to the kids so I showed up. Luckily for me, the aforementioned colleague of mine showed up as well and we ended up spending most of the day putting up decorations and hanging lights around the school. We were designated to embellish the railings of the staircase leading up to a three-storey building and by the time we got to the final floor of the secondary school building and looked down to the other side of the school, the other teachers were too busy to care what was going on where we were.

What started as decorative labour ended up being an undiluted pleasure. With my hand around her neck in one of the empty classrooms, I pounded the words ‘daddy… please’ from her soft, pink lips. What had initially started as a quickie ended up being a lengthy porn scene. There was just something about hearing those words roll off her lips that made me thrust deeper and deeper into her. From one desk to the other we were at it like rabbits during mating season. Towards the end of our steamy encounter, she said it again and that was the added nitrous I needed. With every pleasure-filled murmur of “yes daddy,” my phallus burrowed deeper into her. After about 20minutes give or take, we stepped out of the deserted school building, both drunk on sex and orgasmic euphoria.

Deluding oneself that calling one’s partner ‘daddy’ in the sheets shows signs of unsolved daddy issues or is against a culturally predated custom shows that you aren’t interested in spicing things up and that’s okay for you but not for everyone else. Engaging in sexually explicit is very good for lovemaking as it serves as communication between you and your partner. It’s also a positive reinforcement to the ‘daddy’ letting him know that you’re enjoying whatever sexual theatrics he’s performing on you at that moment. So my advice, If you aren’t already doing it, try it and if it doesn’t sit right with your partner, then at least you tried.

Tilewa Kazeem
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