Happy Valentine’s Day, Sweetie!

Yes, I know it was a few days ago, but it’s our Valentine’s issue this weekend, so I just had to let you know I was thinking of you on the 14th when I wrote this. For those in a relationship, I hope you had a good day on Wednesday. And for the singles, I hope you also celebrated love in other forms with the important people in your lives, appreciating the love of God and family and cherishing the love of friendship.

I wasn’t always lucky with friendships growing up, but I’ve gotten better at making friends as an adult after years of getting to know myself more. I’m a genuine friend to myself than anyone could ever be to me. And because I’ve taken time to understand and love myself, I can easily find my tribe and gravitate towards people who love me, helping them understand me and showing them how to love me — without forgetting to do the same for them. After all, it is a friendship we’re trying to build, and it must be mutually beneficial, but it must start with me loving myself. You’ve got to love yourself first if you want to love others and you want others to love you. I don’t make the rules; it’s just how it has to be. Don’t be afraid to build and start small. You have to start small and do the smaller things that lead to big results, and the same goes for love.

I could write a novel on self-love, but today, I don’t want us to be selfish. I want to talk about platonic love because I feel it’s often overlooked due to the thrills of romantic love.

“Marry your friend.” There’s a reason why marriage advice usually includes being told to nurture the friendship between you and your partner. In many people’s hierarchy of relationships, friendship is put at the lowest level, and marriage is considered the highest level, mostly because it is expected to be long-term — till death. However, a good marriage cannot truly manifest if there is no friendship. So doesn’t that make friendship the most important relationship you have with others?

Some might say the love that exists between romantic partners exceeds that of platonic friends, but I disagree. I think that a good friendship can restore a bad marriage, but a bad friendship automatically turns a good marriage sour. One could live life without having experienced romantic love or die without getting married, but you never live without experiencing friendship. It is an essential facet of human connection.

Platonic love is a unique and valuable form of affection that defies the boundaries of romance and sexual desire. It is a bond rooted in deep emotional intimacy, mutual trust, and unwavering support. Unlike romantic love, which may be fleeting or vulnerable to the challenges of passion and possessiveness, platonic love thrives on authenticity and loyalty. It is a love that finds joy in the other person’s success, celebrates their achievements, and provides comfort during their trials.

One of the most remarkable aspects of platonic love is its unconditional nature. In romantic relationships, love is often qualified by physical attraction, compatibility, and romantic gestures. Platonic love, on the other hand, transcends these superficial markers. It doesn’t depend on physical appearances or the promise of romantic activities. Instead, it is built on shared experiences, mutual understanding, and emotional resonance.

It’s sometimes easier to give grace to your friend when you have a misunderstanding than it is to give your partner, and I think this is because we drain the sweetness of friendship in our romantic relationships with the weight of the expectations that come with the titles; boyfriend, girlfriend, wife, husband or partner. Could this be the media’s fault? Hollywood “romcoms” and Disney fairytales? Maybe. However, we still have the responsibility to correct some of these social constructs that we’ve been force-fed on arrival. These social contrasts are a topic for another day, so we’re starting small. Lol.

In conclusion, while we live in a world often preoccupied with romantic love, we should never underestimate the depth and significance of the love that exists within our platonic relationships.

SGD Spolight
Song of the week:

Odo by Asa

Downtown
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