It has been a couple of weeks since I introduced the #Unshakable mindset and focused on the fact that it is a personal journey – not a ‘one size fits all’. What have you thought about A – K so far?  Let’s do something different and pause on K.

K is for kintsugi

Kintsugi—meaning “to join with gold”—is the Japanese art of repairing broken objects, like pottery or glass, with gold lacquer. This ancient tradition transforms brokenness into beauty, honouring the object’s history and the act of repair. In essence, kintsugi teaches that what has been broken can become even more beautiful when mended. In our own lives, kintsugi becomes a symbol of resilience, reflecting our ability to rebuild after hardship, with our “cracks” becoming unique strengths that add to our character.

As I write this, I’m reflecting on a recent conversation with three close friends: Alicia, Bolanle, and ChiChi. Alicia is newly divorced, Bolanle is widowed, and ChiChi lost her best friend. Each faced their own profound loss. Alicia, though deeply in love, had to walk away from her marriage to save herself from a life that felt more like a prison. Bolanle’s husband, her “ride or die,” passed away suddenly—no warning, just an abrupt ending. And ChiChi, after having planned her estate around her illness, ended up outliving Davinda, her closest friend, in a twist that left her both stunned and adrift. Loss, in its many forms, is a singular grief that leaves an empty void so vast it’s hard to believe the world didn’t end with it.

As we sat around the fireplace, I tried to offer comfort. “The part of your heart that’s been torn out may never return,” I told them. “But the void, over time, will change, evolving from a gaping hole to narrower cracks that slowly, almost imperceptibly, repair—not with restoration, but with gold. This new strength will make you whole again, not as you were, but as something new and resilient. You can’t experience loss this deep without being transformed by it.”

How did I know this? Because this was my journey, too. Had life not thrown its toughest curveballs, the person I am today would not exist, and we wouldn’t be here, bonded by these experiences, wearing the kintsugi-inspired hoodie dress from the #Unshakable shop. As we held hands in a silent circle, our tear-streaked faces reflecting the glow of firelight, I offered a final prayer: “May something beautiful grow in place of what was lost, not to replace it but to honour it, mended with gold.”

At that moment, a sunbeam broke through the window crack, casting a golden glow like a spotlight. Fittingly, Bette Midler’s From a Distance played in the background—a reminder that both grief and healing have endless interpretations and that hope finds its way in the smallest of cracks. Kintsugi is about more than mending objects; it’s about honouring the beauty in scars and the strength that emerges from them.

This is why I chose kintsugi as the inspiration for the hoodie dress. “You are more beautiful for having been broken,” I explained when asked about its meaning. Join me next week as we delve deeper into the journey of becoming #Unshakable.

Sally Chiwuzie
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IG Handle: @unshakable.is.a.state.of.mind